With several things that are going on- the biggest being my Dad's death I'm having a rough time dealing with reality. My friend Lee made my day when yesterday a package arrived for me. It contained the following:
Father and daugher statue
Thank-you Lee for your thoughtfulness and kindness. It's much appreciated and feeling undeserved today.
For those of you who are waiting for me to say something here I'm not going to. If you need to discuss with me then please email me at: amberlicious(at)gmail (dot) com
There are many more people who read my blog then those of you who are angry.
Comments are now being moderated FYI.
I'm back in Vegas and back to my computer- we had a joyful reunion with tears and squeals of joy... wow- that sounds pathetic.
I had a great week (well, as great as it could have been) with my family and as hard as it is to see my Dad pass it's a good thing to see him out of pain. I'll miss his presence- but it was time.
The viewing was a very healing thing and I gave the eulogy at the funeral. That was hard- but was also very healing. Surprisingly I didn't cry except for initally and then was able to make it through it okay.
I'll post my eulogy in a couple of days since this is my journal and I want to keep a record of it.
I've got mounds of laundry to do, two cakes this weekend, visitors this weekend and a housefull of sick kids. So I'll be MIA a bit.
Thanks for the love.
My Dad died peacefully yesterday at about 2pm. We were all around him and were with him when he passed. His pain and suffering has ended. He fought a good fight.
The funeral will be on Monday. I'll not be around much until next week. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.
I'm in Utah staying with my Mom. My siblings are gathering as well as other family members. I'm supposed to talk about my Dad at the funeral. I told my Mom that I'd just be getting up there and blubbering, but apparently it's what he wanted. My emotions seem so unpredictable. I never know if I"m going to be fine to talk or crying and choking on my words.
Mindless drivel...
Four jobs you have had in your life: Soccer Ref, grocery checker, telephone survey taker, Personal Assistant to the President (of IDMP inc- not of the country silly!)
Four Movies you would watch over and over: Return to Me, The Three Amigos, Harry Potter (any of them), The Emperor's new groove!
Four places you have lived: San Deigo, CA, Dayton, OH, Orem UT, Las Vegas, NV
Four TV shows you love to watch: Law and Order: Criminal Intent, Wife Swap, Without a Trace, Scrubs
Four Places you have been on vacation: Hawaii, Catalina Island, Bear Lake, Arches national Park
Four Websites I visit daily: Gmail, here, my boards, sudoku site
Four of my favorite drinks: Stephan's sipping cocoa, Diet Vanilla Cherry Dr. Pepper, Water, Milk
Four of my favorite foods: smoothies, sweet smothered pork burritos, Grilled anything, triple chocolate meltdown cake from applebee's
Four Places I would rather be right now: In Utah with my parents, Hawaii, on a cruise, napping
Four things I always carry with me: My kids (that's four right?), my cell phone, my car keys, extra diapers, wipes and clothes for kids.
I'm feeling like I'm a depressing blogger right now. I can't really think of much to blog about but the obvious. I feel like I'm just sitting around waiting for the other shoe to drop. I can't focus on much of anything. I was thinking about this today- I feel like I did the last month of my pregnancy with Corinne. Waiting, knowing that she would be coming soon- but not sure when. It's the same waiting for the inevitable with my Dad. We all know he's going to die, and we're hoping that it's sooner then later (and those are his wishes as well) but we don't know when that's going to happen. It could be in an hour- it could be in a week or a month even. Sort of like labor when it does finally happen I've never felt 'ready'. I always thought I was, I'd spent months preparing- but then all of a sudden there was no looking back and I wanted to change my mind (and couldn't). I feel the same now. I've been expecting this for a while now- but now that it's upon us I'm not ready- although I don't know how I'll ever be.
